Suito Homu

"Give Me Back My Baby"

Akiko sits down to do some paperwork. Or to work on a model train, I can't tell.

Akiko has no taste in colors or clothing.

"Because if you are, you probably want to get out of that uncomfortable looking thing."

Yes, I hate that dress. And dresses in general.

Emi, she didn't ask about that ugly thing. She asked if you were ready for bed.

"Why I'm not traumatized, I don't know."

"No, I just wear it to scare people."

Dimmer and dimmer and all you see it light? What crazy ass physics do the Japanese have?

More wacky Japanese science. Don't you mean silhouette?

The ugly dress, or the mother's death?

Hey, that kind of rhymed.

Kazuo is a freaking Confucious.

"Who'd he steal them from?"

You might notice that Emi starts to get up from the right of the chair (your left), then suddenly she stops, goes back on the chair, then gets off on the left (your right). Worst directing ever.

"And put your dress down!"

The writers can't seem to figure out Emi's personality. For a while she acts like a little kid, then she acts like an adult, then a kid again, so forth and so on. In fact, what she's referred to flip flops as well. Sometimes she's a "woman", sometimes a "little girl".

"If I do, they won't be anything like you."

Okay, that one I think I'll blame on the subbers.

It's the thought that counts.

"I don't want to wear it."


At first, it appears Kazuo's telling Emi to clean up her stuff. It's actually the other way around.

Oh, and Kazuo's eating again. What is it with this guy and food?

Emi doesn't seem to have a grasp on what marriage is...

No, that's not a video glitch. Emi actually lobs Kazuo's dirty sock in his face.

"Okay, now I've got even more reason to take some soap to your face, but this time your MOUTH!"

"As long as he cleans up after himself, I think we'll be quite happy together."

"Yeah, I'll have to read in the dark now."

You mean... turning out lights... makes it dark? Hot damn, you must be a rocket scientist!

You're still getting into bed. No you're not.

Oh, that looks REEEAAAL comfortable.

"AAH! Boogeyman!"

Lights out, snooze time!


Eh? Everyone else has slipped into something more comfortable, and Taguchi's still running around in that getup? Does he sleep in it?

Splish splash I was taking a... uh...

I love the way Taguchi gawks at the shadow like he's seeing a naked woman for the first time.

The only time you see anybody besides Kazuo consume anything is right now, when Taguchi takes a shot of whiskey.

He then proceeds to call Asuka beautiful and dry her hair. Potent stuff, I tell ya.

As Taguchi violently whips Asuka's head around with a towel, Asuka demands Taguchi to give her back her baby. At first, you'd think it was the wiplash talking.


I said "Give me back my baby", retard!

In one of the few truly frightening moments in the movie, Asuka pulls off the towel to reveal the burned face of Mamiya Ichirou.

By the way, remember back in Chapter 3 when the projector went on fire, and a face seemed to appear in the holes of the slide? Well, taking a careful look at it, it appears to be this image of Mamiya, though somehow lurking in the shadows.

Taguchi falls back terrified. Perhaps the improvement was more than he could bear.

Asuka reverts back to her old self, and starts looming over Taguchi while looking like every other Japanese horror girl ever.

Enough about your damn baby!

Well gee, if you two are husband and wife like this movie suggests but never makes clear, no wonder she's so pissed.

And he's off. Screens can't show you how cheey and tightarsed his run is.

After Taguchi runs out the door, it shifts to Asuka digging up something. Oh boy, Mamiya's gonna love this.

Pointless scene of dirt flying in the air. Guess the directors wanted to make it a point to show how nice the soil on the Ichirou estate is?

Nice closeup of the coffin.

After the coffin appears, so does Asuka. Why did you go clean your hair if you were going to get it all dirty again?

Get a manicure, lady.

Asuka pulls the baby out of its coffin. Mamiya's really gonna love this.

Kid's pretty well preserved for having died thirty years ago.

Actually, given the way Asuka handles the baby, it starts to make me think it's Mamiya possessing her to enter the physical world to make sure her baby's okay. Well, whatever "okay" for a baby that got burned to death is.

Another relatively scary scene that gets thrown out the window by its immediate followup. The baby's body start to move, and let's out a blood chilling cry as its neck snaps back.

A zoom over to the house.

"I can't believe I lost that hottie. Sure, she was covered in burns and missing an eye, but compared to Asuka, wraor."

"Well, that was a curious noise."


"Damn redneck neighbors!"

Funny it doesn't wake up Kazuo. I mean, Taguchi was clearly drunk off his rocker when he got woken up.

Emi, he's not even awake!

Emi, realizes she's wasting her voice, and shuts up.

Chapter 4: More Purdy Pictures
Back to Suito Homu