Game Quickies 6/10/09

LocoRoco (PSP / E)
Imagine if you will, what Katamari Damacy would be like if the goal wasn't to roll around picking up a bunch of crap, but to roll from one end of a linear 2D path to the other. Also imagine it with even worse controls and even more nausiating graphics. Viola, you've just painted an accurate picture of LocoRoco.
Rating: Garbage

LEGO Indiana Jones (360 / E)
Well it was still better than LEGO Star Wars.
Rating: Lame

Legend of Heroes: Tear of Vermillion (PSP / T)
One of if not the most obnoxiously dragged out and cliche ridden JRPG I've ever played. After spending the first half of the game hammering Attack to get through the battles, getting sidetracked a hundred times, backtracking through identical forest areas, and running across so many cliches you could make a drinking game out of it, my ultimate goal for the second half wasn't stopping the resurrection of a god that would destroy the world, or getting the hero his stupid sister back, or just seeing the ending, but getting a guy in a dress back from the dead. Actually, I don't know if that says more about me or the game.
Rating: Lame

E.T. The Extra-Terrestrial (2600)
This game sits just below "The cake is a lie!" on my list of things people need to shut the hell up about. No, it's not a good game, but it's far from "worst game ever" as everyone says it is. The biggest challenge is figuring out what the context-sensitive pictures mean (something you can look up at GameFAQs), and after that you can finish all three settings in about half an hour.
Rating: Limp

Mirror's Edge (360 / T)
This game never should have happened. If the creators had been paying attention to the history of gaming and seen games like the original Turoks, they'd know platforming from the first person is inherently flawed because you need to be able to see your feet. And then you add in the acrobatics Prince of Persia: Sands of Time, imbalanced combat, and poor hit detection, and you're left with one big mess.
Rating: Bad

The Secret of Monkey Island (PC)
Hilarious writing, good and logical puzzles, and beautiful if occasionally disturbing graphics (Head of the Navigator, yeesh). It's a little hard for me to write about because it took me almost a year to finish this game, and I wasn't playing it for most of that year.
Rating: Good

05/18/09 Games - Jak & Daxter, Shining Soul, Doom 2, Smash Bros. Brawl, Crisis Core, PREY
10/03/09 Games - Fable 2, Banjo-Kazooie, Agony, Prince of Persia: Sands of Time, Resident Evil 4, Halo
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